Thursday, February 18, 2016

Cheap Trick Is Playing The Wild-Blackhawks Stadium Series Game

I am usually super critical of the decisions that the NHL makes about musical performances at their major events. It's not just hockey really, because I do it for basically every sporting event because I'm an asshole.
So basically, we get a main show of I Want You To Want Me, Surrender, Dream Police, and maybe The Flame?

I'm not going to say that show will suck, but I'm sure we're all thinking it. That's what we're left with then they insist of using hometown musical talent - we get Dierks Bentley and a bunch of no-name country singers at the All-Star Game, and we get a 40 year old band from a suburb of Chicago for the outdoor Wild-Blackhawks game. Typical NHL bias, including the 'Hawks in every outdoor game every played and also giving them home field advantage during the halftime show.

 Who could the NHL have gotten instead? I mean, they basically had their pick of every band from the whole state of Minnesota and chose Cheap Trick - from Rockford, Illinois - instead.

The nominees, with four-song set lists that should all be at least as good as Cheap Trick:

Semisonic (from Minneapolis)

Set list: Closing Time, Closing Time, Closing Time, Closing Time

This would be the best intermission show of all time. How freakin' incredible would it be if Semisonic came out and just played their only song four times in a row?

They could mix in some guest artists, like maybe a Travis Barker drum solo or a Skrillex guitar solo, and the whole thing would generate so much buzz that hockey twitter would probably implode.

Motion City Soundtrack (from Minneapolis)

Set list: ???

For some reason, I thought this was a band that had some popular songs. I was mistaken, and they would without a doubt be worse than Cheap Trick or Simple Plan or anyone else that was considered. Sorry, let's move on.

Haley Bonar (from Duluth and St. Paul)

I'm not even going to pretend to know any of her songs, but she was on the list of Minnesotan musicians that I found, and her last name is enjoyable. Plus just look at this girl, know that she's a talented musician, and tell me why she landed on being a folk singer instead of going the Taylor Swift/Katy Perry route and becoming a superstar.

Haley Bonar - remember the name (as long as she fires the shit out of her agent and rebrands herself).

Bob Dylan (born in Duluth)

Set list: The Times They Are A-Changin' (Radko Gudas tribute montage), Like A Rolling Stone, Tangled Up In Blue, All Along The Watchtower (with a Tim Reynolds solo to close it out)

One of the best of all time, and he'd be performing in his home state. I think the one knock on Dylan here, besides the fact that he's like 1000000% above the NHL's budget, is he's more mellow than the usually-intense game of hockey.

Prince (born in Minneapolis)

Set list: Let's Go Crazy, Kiss, Purple Rain, When Doves Cry

I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that Prince would make for the best halftime show in history? Wait, what's that? He already did rock out the best halftime show ever?

Prince is the greatest. 

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